Brentwood Town FC

Firstly, it's a cracking badge. Brentwood is derived from "Burnt Wood"—hence the flames dividing the shield. A nice literal touch.

Saxons settled the area first, but legend says it flourished after the death of Thomas Becket in 1170. Becket, Archbishop of Canterbury, supposedly angered Henry II, who said, "Who will rid me of this meddlesome priest?" (At least, he does in Shakespeare’s version). In response, three knights trotted off and killed Becket in Canterbury Cathedral. The news shocked Europe, turning Canterbury into a pilgrimage site.

Brentwood was conveniently located on the road from London to Tilbury, where pilgrims ferried to Canterbury. With recently burnt woods clearing space, homes and inns for pilgrims sprung up, making it a Becket boom town. I imagine medieval Del Boys selling knock-off Becket T-shirts and Cathedral snow globes.

The shield also features a blackbird with walking sticks—symbols of Saint Thomas of Canterbury. Brentwood High Street has a chapel dedicated to him, and a district is called Pilgrim’s Hatch (hatch meaning gate).

Brentwood was built on a Becket bonanza.

(Some local historians downplay this—but they’re boring. And wrong.)

There’s more to the badge:

The three crowns symbolise the Abbey of St Osyth, one of Europe’s largest abbeys. Its monks managed lands, including Brentwood, perhaps it was them who spotted the opportunity to expand into pilgrim themed hospitality.

Osyth herself was fascinating. A Saxon king’s daughter (possibly Redwald’s), she fled an arranged marriage to become a nun. Her understanding would-be husband gifted her land for an abbey. Later, Vikings demanded she renounce Christianity. She refused, so they beheaded her.

Here’s the best bit: Osyth supposedly picked up her severed head, tucked it under her arm, and walked back to the abbey. Legend says her headless ghost still appears today.

Having once seen a Brentwood girl down 23 Sambucas, twist her ankle in heels, and fend off a dozen police officers, I’m inclined to believe it. Essex girls are built different.

The badge’s turret references Weald Hall, a Tudor mansion knocked down after soldiers billeted there during WWII damaged it—much like Belhus in nearby Aveley (@AveleyFC)

The stag atop the badge nods to Weald Park and its deer population—or it could also be Richard II’s emblem, the White Hart. He stayed at a building later named The White Hart Inn, which closed in the 2000s and reopened as the Sugar Hut, made famous by TOWIE.

Brentwood has it all.

Money-making monks, headless saints, and reality TV stars. Brentwood has always had an Ardens Fide in its abilities.